Dear god.
Thanks to Michael ‘BanyaBat’ Butter for the edits!
| Video Game Theme Parks |
|---|
| Category 1: Ride where it takes a photo of you at some point |
| S: The Mount Olympus God-Killer (God of War 3) |
| M: Pokémon Neck Snap |
| Category 2: Ride involving water |
| M: Heavy Rain Splash Mountain |
| S: Bioshock Log Flume |
| Category 3: Haunted house |
| S: Silent Hill 2 Wife Guy Simulator |
| M: P.T. Corridor of Terror |
| Category 4: Ride that’s genuinely a danger to your physical health/someone will die on it at some point |
| M: Life is Strange: Paths Not Taken |
| S: The Rocket League Ball Cage |
| Category 5: Ride for small children |
| S: The Astrobot Teacups |
| M: Wario’s It’s a Smell World After All |
| Category 6: Interactive cinema ride/VR ride |
| M: Augmented Reality Navi |
| S: Leon - Jack Krauser Knife Fight |
| Category 7: Tunnel of love-style romantic ride for couples (or throuples, up to you really) |
| S: Catherine Stray Sheep Katherine Love Tester |
| M: Final Fantasy VII Ferris Wheel |
| Category 8: Something involving animatronic puppets |
| M: Pirates of the Obra Dinn |
| S: Sonic characters sing the history of the Sonic Franchise |
| Category 9: Ride that’s out of order every time you visit because it’s so complex it keeps fucking breaking |
| S: Leviathan Raid from Destiny 2 |
| M: Metal Gear Fulton Extraction |
| Category 10: Ride that just drops you from high up in the air |
| M: Assassin’s Creed Unity Glitch Experience |
| S Assassin’s Creed Leap of Faith |
| Category 11: Theme park mascot |
| S: Lu Bu from Dynasty Warriors |
| M: Tut-mon (Yuji Naka) |
| Category 12: Piece of music piped through theme park 24/7 |
| M: Wii Shop Music |
| S: Traverse Town - Kingdom Hearts Dream Drop Distance |
| Category 13: Parade through park based on video game franchise |
| S: Dynasty Warriors Parade |
| M: Mii Parade |
| Category 14: Live show featuring budget actors and some kind of stunts |
| M: Death Stranding Show |
| S: Max Payne 3 Favela Shoot-out |
| Category 15: Themed hotel (expensive option) |
| M: Hit-Man Hokkaido Spa |
| S: Don Corneo’s Mansion |
| Category 16: Themed hotel (budget option) |
| S: The Tanker from Metal Gear Solid 2 |
| M: Hotel Dusk |
| Category 17: Most interesting bit of merch |
| M: Paranormasight: The Seven Collectable Plushies of Honjo |
| S: Playable copies of every game featured at the park |
| Category 18: Most cursed bit of merch |
| S: Pyramid Head plush |
| M: Life-sized chocolate effigy of Matthew and a doll of a farting child |
| Category 19: Themed restaurant |
| M: Overcooked The Live Dining Experience |
| S: Cafeteria from Balamb Garden |
| Category 20: Free pick - anything you want, within the boundaries of Back Page lore |
| S: Real Life Blitzball Stadium |
| M: An Audience with Shu Takumi |
Results
- Matthew 63% (25 votes)
- Samuel 38% (15 votes)
- (40 votes)